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My Girlfriend is an Angry Japanese Ghost
#1
Carl es un escritor de guiones para peliculas porno. Le encanta usar juegos de palabras tanto en sus relatos como en su vida real. Y es un tipo muy aplicado en su trabajo, ya que si vas a hacer juegos de palabras con palabras como "pizza con salchicha extra", "palanca de cambios", "probeta", "humedad en ascenso" tenes que conocer algo de dichas profesiones.
Un dia la empresa para la que trabaja se asocia con otra de citas llamada Supernatural Singles. La idea es que algunos de los "clientes" de dicha empresa participen en algunas de las producciones porno como una forma de promocionar sus servicios.

Asi que el protagonista tiene que escribir los dialogos y supervisar las escenas porno de:
a) hombre vampiro de 600 años con problemas de memoria. Despues de todo si vivis tanto tiempo tu cerebro se llena y vas borrando las cosas las viejas, como tu nombre o que comiste el dia anterior.
b) mujer lobo con alergia a su propio pelo. Ouch.
c) zombie. No habla mucho.
d) bruja con aspecto de loli. Novia de Satan.
e) chica fantasma. Y no cualquier fantasma. Una Onryō. Un fantasma vengador como Sadako de The Ring, de pelo negro largo, siempre chorreando sangre.

[Imagen: ghost_zps0d0503c8.jpg]

No exenta de ciertos...inconvenientes, la filmacion avanza hasta llegar a la fantasma. Luego de que el set casi termina destruido y con dos actores porno muertos, y ante la promesa de ser despedido, a nuestro pobre escritor no le queda mas que actuar el con la fantasma.

Y ahi es cuando empiezan los verdaderos problemas. Porque ahora la fantasma se ha encariñado con el.

Libro en Amazon.


Review:
estoy apoyado contra la mesa de la computadora, tratando de relajar los musculos de mi rostro porque no pude parar de reirme todo el tiempo que duro la lectura de este libro. Los juegos de palabras, las frases, los personajes, las situaciones. No te da respiro. Y todo por un solo dolar.
¿Lo malo? Que termina y te deja deseando mucho mas.



Cita:- Is it true what they say about the witch?-
- Uhm?-
- I´ve heard she looks 12 years old.-
I left my chin and ponder for a moment.
- Hmmm...well she´s a tiny little person, but i wouldn´t say she looks 12. Maybe a midget 16 year old.
- Hell, really?-
- Yeah. But the truth is creepier than that. Stan emailed me their basic profiles, and apparently, she´s actually 78 years old. -
- So having sex with her will make you feel like a pedophile AND a gerontophile.-

Cita:“Well Carl, Derrick here tells me that in the last two shots, it was your script that led to some unfortunate incidents with our actors. As I understand it, Vanessa has quit her job, joined a convent, and has started contacting Pepper Spray manufacturers; and John, over the course of the shooting, has unwittingly become the world’s greatest Goatse impersonator.”

Cita:-... I’ve moved into the alleyway next to the building for the next few days.-
-¿What’s wrong? Did your neighbors complain about the air pollution, or did they confuse your room for the trash deposit and you were drowning in plastic bags?-
-That only happened ONCE.- I huffed, turning back to the laptop. -And for your information, trash bags make perfect condoms for me.-

Cita:-Wow... that was amazing... baby.- I coughed . -It was like getting an ice-cube shoved down my dick hole. -
-Cut!-
-It was drinking a gallon of honey and passing out next to an army ant farm.-
-CUT!-
-It was like having sex with a gasoline-laced condom next to a bonfire.-
- SAY YOUR DAMN LINE RIGHT!!!!-

Cita:I’m not sure why it was seven days--maybe that was how long it took ghosts to “charge” their teleportation. Maybe the stars weren’t aligned yet. Maybe the cost of plane tickets were predicted to be lower in seven days and she was being stingy, or maybe she just really hated numbers 1 through 6, but either way, she wasn’t making the trip back now, and I wouldn’t expect her to just sit on her ass and do nothing before she got back here.

Cita:I actually slept pretty okay last night. Living with Kim was sort of like watching the same horror movie four times in a row. All the shit that scared you the first time is still there-- it hadn’t changed, but you just sort of... got used to it. At least as far as scares go. She was still cold and moist and her breathing sounded like she was filtering everything through a Darth Vader mask covered in yogurt, but that was just like sleeping with a live salmon on your stomach , which is tolerable. I didn’t LIKE it, mind, but I wasn’t giving adult diaper manufacturers anything to get excited about anymore.

Cita:She nodded, latching onto my arm and smiling. It was a pretty genuine smile--if she wasn’t... well, Kim, I would have found it adorable. Unfortunately, for as authentic as the smile was, it was still plastered on a porcelain, uncomfortably stilled face, so I found it a little less cute and a little more “aw shit that’s just wrong”, like when you saw a human’s grin photoshopped onto a bear or something.

Cita:-Well, you can’t forget Billy the Kid. He was small and a quick shot, but at least he knew how to handle his pistol.
- Perhaps there’s some truth to that, but I’ll stick with Nikola Tesla. They say his balls were electrifying and magnetic.-





[-] The following 1 user Likes hormiga_electrica's post:
  • Lapraswithagun
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#2
Lo compre en amazon y lo lei por tu recomendacion.
No puedo creeer lo que me rei en toda la trama del libro, muy bueno, muchas gracias por la reseña





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#3
De nada Big Grin  Todavia me estoy riendo con ese libro. Hasta hice un par de fanarts de Kim y Mathilda.

Ojala que alguna vez tenga continuacion.





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#4
originalmente lo descubri por mirar tu deviantart (si, stalkee a todas las personas con participacion activa en el foro, soy una persona muy aburrida) pero ya que vi recien que habias hecho un post al respecto decidi comentar y dar las gracias.





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